Another day I’ve survived with this hole bored into my soul. The rain fell violently this morning and the sound it made still disturbs me. I’m awake but everything that I do seems fake,from my demeanor, my smile to my laughter.
The pounding of my heart could separate a roof from its rafters. But I go on. One foot in front of the other. One day at a time.
One week and then another. I exist, despite all the pain. On the outside there may be little to notice but inside I’m not the same. I’m a shell of what I used to be. If you were to look a little bit closer you might see the fear. You might see that I’m desperately searching for the me that used to be here.
This is the third and final part of my series about the fall of the United States. Part three will cover the economy. Enjoy
The hard working American people are being kicked off the rungs of the ladder as they try to climb their way to a better life. For the past 4yrs all we have been hearing is there is going to be a recession as the economy is in a decline. At least that is what the Fed (Federal Reseve Board) wants us to believe.
The job market for employed Americans has never been any better but you would not know that from all the hand ringing in the media and politicians. Every time gas prices go up it is blamed on the current president and his administration but in actuality it is Opec (Organization of Petroleum Exporting Countries) of the Middle East and Venezuela that controls the price of oil.
What usually happens is they cut back the supply of oil to the U.S. which in turn creates a shortage and forces gas prices higher. It’s the standard practice of supply and demand.
So you see, the president has nothing to do with how much gas we pay.
This is merely a political ploy (mostly by the Republican Party) to enrage the public against the opposing party. They play on the ignorance of the public and lack of their understanding of the oil business.You never hear them utter a word when the price of gas goes down.
Another thing that has happened with the outcry about a recession is the elevation of the price of food and other products found in the grocery store. This is said to be one of the indicators of a recession. However what it really seems to be is a money grab by the food suppliers to pay their financial sheets to meet those salaries and bonuses given to the companies CEO’s.
They will try to tell you it’s from the workers being paid higher wages and other cost effects like providing benefits such as health care. One thing remains the same in this world. People have to eat, drink and provide all of the other essentials to survive day to day. They are going to make their money and they don’t have to raise taxes to do it. The famous line you hear during any so-called recession period is that the Fed wants to slow the economy down to avoid it.
So they basically try to force the middle and lower class into practically going bankrupt.
It starts with raising interest rates in the housing market. One day the housing market is booming and the next it slows down because the interest rates have become too much for the common person to afford buying a house. It also forces sellers to get less for properties they have on the market. Can you say housing crisis? All manufactured by the Fed.
It’s all a design to keep the middle class and working poor from gaining real progress in the United States. It’s a messed up system that has been perpetrated for years and years.
Think about it. There have been record numbers in jobs created and record numbers in low unemployment. The Housing Market was doing fine. People who may have thought they would never own a home were actually in a position to do so financially with one of the factors being low interest rates and down payments. Folks were paying their credit cards while at the same time saving a bit more money. The Wall Street Stock Market was and is doing great.Then BOOM! A Recession is coming. The fact that it has not come is more evidence that this was made up to invoke panic in the stock and housing market. In fact the market experts are now suggesting that we may not see it as bad as predicted. You know the funny thing is that the closer we get to a presidential election year the more fear mongering oozes out of Washington, D.C. Coincidence? I think not. Here’s another way the powers that be implemented their plan to keep from spreading the wealth. All around the country employee wages have increased.
The minimum wage has risen anywhere from twelve to fifthteen dollars or more.
This was done as I said before to give the working class a leg up on reaching that american dream but mainly to be able to support yourself or your family without starving or being able to afford housing. So what did these corporations and companies do to offset this cost?
They started by cutting hours from a forty hour work shift to thirty or less for full time and partime employees. Then we began to notice the self checkout machines in the grocery stores, big box stores. How do you like your new job? By installing these self checkout machines where you have to scan and bag your own groceries, they are in effect putting you the customer to work at very little expense to the corporate office.
Banks cut the number of tellers and some went to more drive through only services to limit payroll. Other business and retail stores followed suit with less cashiers at the registers.
Less employees, less hours mean less benefits that they have to pay out. After covid you heard business, especially restaurants proclaiming they were short staff. The media played it as people didn’t want to go to work because they got too used to being at home or collecting covid money. That was mostly B.S. Sure some folks took avantage because that is what they do.
They feel the government tries to get over on us so why not return the favor.
The truth of the matter is that these businesses were not offering enough hours to new hires or existing employees because of the minimum wage hike. During the discussions on passing such a bill for the minimum wage increase all you heard were restaurant owners, small business owners and corporate offices bemoaning that it was going to cut into their financial margins.
Have any of you seen the new robot servers in some of the fast food establishments?
Just another way to cut out the worker and save cost.
Republicans are good at expounding the virtues of pulling yourself up by the bootstraps and working hard to make the American dream come true but when there is any effort to help folks do just that they land on the side of the businesses and corporations. Not the everyday folk they proclaim to care about. In this scenario you hate the game and the players.
So as they say, don’t fall for the “okee doke”, “banana in the tailpipe” or whichever cliche suits the situation. This country has more than enough to spread the wealth. The only problem is that it’s not very good at sharing.
In the second part of my view on the Fall of the U.S. I wanted to get into a few of the other ways the United States is lagging behind other competitive countries.
One is innovation and technology. The politicians that control what legislation gets passed (he said tongue in cheek) are so afraid of accepting that the world is changing dramatically with the computerization of everything we touch. They use it as a battle cry that China is filling America with its technology to destroy us. Now I’m not an economist but If you were to really look into it you might see that those very same political hacks are the ones that started the ball rolling. America has been sold off piece by piece since the 1980’s to corporations from Japan and China. They hold the largest debt owed by the United States. This was part of the remastering of American industry and its workers by the cowboy and chief (40) from California. It started with breaking down the unions thus weakening the workers bargaining power to get and maintain fair wages. They then started offshoring manufacturing needs to other countries with China getting a huge chunk of that deal. Less orders to the manufacturer meet less work for the workers which meant less and less hours to work. Those companies were either forced to sell or they filed bankruptcy and went under. Some formed new companies and reopened with non-union employees. This started to snowball when the air traffic controllers (a union Shop) voted to strike and were given an ultimatum by the then president and cowboy to return to work or be fired and replaced with non union workers. If I’m not mistaken It was the first time a sitting president intervened in a labor dispute. Nevertheless the union was broken and it started a new trend and blueprint on how to break unions. This carried over in the companies that were public in the stock market. A number of large companies with stock options began to sell those options to China where they became majority owners. Some were bought out right but maintained the American brand names. This was to make the public remain in the dark about the true ownership of their favorite products. One of the largest industries in the country also was a part of this plan to sell off America’s industries. In the 80’s the auto industry was having financial problems. Sales were down. Could the cause of this anomaly be due to the Japanese car companies taking their place in with American car consumers? Their cars were smaller with more technology features that the American cars were not equipped with. Namely gas cost and mileage. Meaning they were less to fill up and got better gas mileage. The prices were more affordable.
The American automobile was strong on big is better and the top four automakers did not disappoint. However as I said there was a shiny new toy in the room and soon many American car buyers began to go after it. So much so that it created a change in the American auto industry. By the late seventies and eighties they changed the size of some of their largest selling cars while creating new models of smaller cars to compete with the Japanese and other foreign car companies that had begun putting their footprints in the American car industry. Another factor with the foreign market was they were non-union. Not only were they competing they were doing it by paying their workers less. More money for the top. With the Japanese car companies emerging on the scene one of the big four suffered a huge financial hardship when they lost money and had to lay off workers. The company had somewhat of a resurgence when the CEO Lee Iococca https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lee_Iacocca of the Chrysler corporation came up with a new series of cars (the K-cars) to compete in size, dependability and gas mileage with the foreign market. Grant you they looked like a steel box with no amenities of luxury but they did turn things around for them. They would not regain their full status for years to come. Other foreign car companies emerged and some failed miserably like the Yugo, a car from Yougoslavia ( It was really ugly). Where does China come in on this? They sell most of the parts needed for American cars. Remember when I mentioned about those manufacturing companies closing? A large part of that were the makers of auto parts. The parts are made cheaper with cheap labor. America gets its piece of the pie from import services etc. The politicians got their piece of the pie through campaign donations and the American people keep getting screwed. Less jobs. Less taxes being paid. Unemployment on the rise. So what does the cowboy do to offset the tax situation? He borrows money from China. Tons of it. So much so we’re still borrowing and paying today. The steel mills which employed thousands of Americans with good paying union jobs suffered at the hands of President cowboy (40) and China. With all of these new trade policies by that administration many of the things you pick up in the store, our clothes ,furniture, appliances, building products such as lumber and steel mostly come from China and other foreign countries.
We suffered another economic blow when farming was sold off to China. The cowboy even went as far to pay farmers not to sell to American Business. They struck a deal to sell to China instead. Those farms that did not go along with this plan soon found themselves struggling to survive. There had to be a charity started to save American Farmers who could not afford their mortgages called “Farm Aid”. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Farm_Aid China has been in this country for decades so why are these politicians raising a stink about Tik Tok and other Chinese technology? Money. They want some of the pie before they go sit down and let business run as usual. It’s not for our benefit. They sold us out long ago. At one time America was right there at the top of the technology industry but when the government and the CEO’s of the tech companies manipulated the trade market we gave way to… that’s right China. The U.S. tech companies cut corners on labor and manufacturing by paying cheaper wages and cheaper parts. Just as they did with the other industries they supply the parts to your electronic devices. The leading giant for cell phones and computers are not made in America. Heck our former President (45) probably made the majority of his business deals with China. And it did not stop while he was in office. His family also had business deals that are most profitable with China. Dad and daughter have clothing lines manufactured there. Cheaper wages and no unions. This is the new American way. The America that once ran on its industries now depends on the financial institutions of Wall Street. America has racked up huge debt and it belongs mostly to Japan and China. They also import large sums of product into America’s economy. So just to give you an analogy on what a government shutdown might bring. So let’s just say you can’t or refuse to pay your mortgage or car note for the next few months. What will happen next is the bank or car company will start proceedings to relieve you of your home and car. So when a faction of the Congress decides to default on the U.S. debt that means we cannot only pay our debts or government employees. We can’t pay China, Japan and other countries we may owe money to. If the two largest debt holders call in their chips then guess who now owns the U.S.? That’s right, Japan and China. Could it really happen? I don’t know but we damn sure should not want to find out. The bottom line is we the American people have no control over what these keepers of the gate do with our democracy. The new mantra for them is no longer “I pledge allegiance to the flag and of the Republic for which it stands” but I pledge allegiance to the CEO’s and all of their demands.
We have been told for as long as I can remember that the United States of America is the greatest country in the world. We are simply proving in the last 20 or so years that it is not.
We have one of the poorest poverty rates of any of the powerful countries in today’s world and one of the largest poor health ratings. For America to be as great as it claims, the health care system is responsible for the major debt of most of its citizens. Especially amongst its seniors.
Many can’t afford health insurance. Meanwhile it is one side of congress that tries to pry what little they have from them every chance they get. All the while having the best free health care in the country.
On one hand the conservative politicians in America love to spout that they are for the citizens while the other one is trying to pick their pockets of Social Security and Medicare.
It is a constant battle of the left and the right fighting over how we get to live.
It’s quite unbelievable. In recent events the one side of the political spectrum in the U.S. congress elected to fire the Speaker of the House because he had the audacity to work with the other side for an agreement to keep the government from shutting down. So basically stopping the whole shebang from coming to a grinding halt. Those few people in his own party brought forth a motion to remove him. Almost a month later they still had not elected a new Speaker. It took several attempts until they finally settled on someone. Here’s the kicker for us as citizens. They still were getting paid to not perform their duties. And they call the struggling and hard working Americans takers and slackers. These people in congress are the biggest beneficiaries of social and government welfare.
Many of the members in both the congress and the senate are well past 60yrs of age or approaching it. They have made it a lifelong career and have made no real effort to forward this country. Meanwhile In the UK progress can be seen throughout their land.
The U.S. is a victim of its own ego and failure to accept that the world is changing rapidly.
It clings to what was considered the great days of yesteryear. Which when you go back and take a look at the real history of this country was not so great. It was built on the backs of slaves.
It’s filled with war times,poverty, racism, and separatism.
Think about this for a minute. The founding fathers rose up against tyranny in Europe and fought to have a new way of life that would reign with freedom and choice in a new land.
Then as if they forgot what they fought so hard to get,decided to cross the sea to another continent, capture and enslave Aficans to serve their will. Those very leaders owned slaves.
Many of them raping and inprenating their Afican slave women. This hideous practice continued through generations of white slave owners. This is the U.S. history that has been whitewashed (pun intended) throughout my 64yrs on this earth. Moving on.
In today’s politics one party (Republicans) loves to cite what great leaders their past presidents were when in actuality they did the least to help the working and middle class.
The other party (Democrats) has very little to show for their time as well although some of their policies have been beneficial to all Americans as well they did not go as far as one would have liked.
We have to face it. The political system in today’s United States has been overrun with those only interested in making a splash in social media and cable news outlets.
The U.S. is now run by corporate America and its billionaires. The top one percent if you will.
All three judicial branches of government are bought and paid for.
Just read up on how the conservative justices came to be appointed and how they have prospered.
This country is debating over whether to elect the current president or the former one.
One is being criticized for his advanced age and mental state. while one is bogged down with court indictments for fraud and trying to overthrow the government. Did I mention that the same candidate is at an advanced age himself? Some might also say he’s cognitively unbalanced.
In a cult-like fashion,he is leading his party’s run for president, worshiped by his followers, congress and the senate. This has all the makings of a bad movie.
It is a complete mess. Other countries must be laughing at how far we have fallen.
There must be a bowel movement in all three branches if we are to move this country in the right direction. America is like an ambivalent child that won’t take its medicine.
We’re going to have to grab it, look it in the eye and say Open Up and Say Ahh!.
I Just turned sixty four. I’m sitting here in the desert sun with temperatures of 118 degrees.
Most days my mind along with my memories are shrinking with each moment of passing time. I’m here but I’m I present?
So many things change as you get into this stage of your life. For some it’s a time to reclaim your independence from your kids.
It’s a time to embrace your grandchildren and watch your children embrace parenthood.
It’s the time to embark on your future.
I’m a senior now.
We’re called the boomer generation.
That last generation of hope and prosperity from the late fifties and sixties.
I thought about this time in my life a lot when I hit fifty. Retirement was just around the corner and I had a plan of where I wanted to be. Nestled in the arms of Arizona.
Just my wife and I.
We were going to watch the glorious sunsets of the desert sun sitting on our backyard patio sipping on something cold.
I still have that passion to get there.
It’s figuring out the logistics to make it happen.
There are variables in play. People and things to consider. For instance those grandchildren. How can we not miss seeing them grow? Our children. Though grown we’ll never stop being parents to them.
It makes you hesitant.
It pulls at my heart to leave because you’ll be so far away. Then there is the home we built filled with so many memories.
Do you just sell and move on or keep it as a legacy for your family?
It’s a difficult decision. On one hand you must think about your own financial survival. On the other hand, you’d like to leave some generational wealth for your children.
Decisions, decisions.
As the sun warms the side of my face I look around and feel a sense of home. A sense of peace.
This is where I want to be, it’s just a matter of time,planning and patience.
It’s the day my daughter and son inlaw got married.
It’s the birthdate of my wife’s and my favorite artist Prince.
It is also four years ago today that I survived a little thing called the widowmaker.
That’s right, a heart attack, a 100% blockage in my left ventricle artery (L.A.D.)
It all started the day of my granddaughter’s high school graduation.
It was a beautiful evening for such a happy event.
The ceremonies had just ended and I was wheeling my mom out of the auditorium. That’s when I first felt this strange feeling in my chest area. I didn’t think much of it at first. We continued celebrating,taking picture after picture. The feeling didn’t let up. Since we were not too far from our house I decided to walk back home and meet the family there.
My wife and mom thought it strange that I wanted to walk.
They know instinctively when something is going on with me.
I assured them when we all got home that everything was fine and that I just had a little indigestion and wanted to walk it off.
I took some antacids and laid down before I had to go to work.
When I got up from my nap at about 10:00PM I still was not feeling well.
My wife being the caring person that she is insisted that we go to the emergency room because it could be something more.
I tried to fight her about it but that usually does not work.
So we went. As we drove up to the emergency room I was looking for any excuse not to go in. And ahah, it was crowded. I had my excuse.
I would go to work and come back tomorrow if it persisted.
It did. I was miserable all through the night at work.
That morning I called my friend and told him what was going on and he too insisted that I go to the hospital. I said I would but instead I took more antacids and some aspirin just in case I was experiencing a heart attack.
I laid down again and took another short nap awaking at 2pm to go do a baseball training session. Laboring more and more I began to now really start worrying that maybe I am having a heart attack and should get back to the hospital. (Ya Think?) so I called my wife who was getting her nails done that I was finished. She was just finishing up as well so I went to pick her up not telling her how bad my situation had gotten. Oh forgot to mention I took the kid I was working with home first. Once she got in the car I immediately looked at her and said we have to go to the hospital. She took one look at me and said let’s go, do you need me to drive?
Me being the hard head that I am (as if you haven’t figured that out by now) said no I got it.
Off we went and when I say that everything that could slow our route down did. As I mentioned it was Prince’s birthday and on the car radio they were playing Prince. I thought, is this a sign?
Am I about to get an upfront and personal seat at a Prince concert in heaven? Sorry I’m not ready brother. I am not dying on my daughter’s anniversary. I’d never forgive myself. So despite the traffic, the trains and the circumstances we made it to the ER.
They took me right away once my hero took charge and informed them what was happening with me. They gave me an E.K.G.
I looked at the nurse’s face and it said Oh Sh….
I’m still talking and laughing about the whole thing. Mainly I was trying to keep my wife calm and to convince myself that this was not that serious. They got me upstairs to the heart floor but wheeled me into the hallway and you know,left me there. And wouldn’t you know some guy that we saw lying on the sidewalk was rushed in but refusing help. He took all of the attention of the nurses and security.
Meanwhile I’m feeling like crap butI just found this ironic. I mean It took me this long to get here. Then once again she (my wife) jumped in and took charge. I don’t care what you all have going on over there but my husband has been laying in the hallway possibly having a heart attack so somebody better get him in one of those rooms to see a doctor.
I had gotten up and went to the bathroom so when she pointed no one was there. Oops.
They did get me in a room and hooked me up to an E.K.G. machine and asked me a ton of questions to which I answered and playfully joked that this was really nothing but a stomach ache. Suddenly there were at least five doctors and more nurse’s running in the room. Then I saw one of the doctors huddled up in the corner with my wife like he was at the club trying to get his mack on. I’m like what the hell is going on here? A nurse leaned over and said we need to get you out of your clothes and get you upstairs for surgery. I’m Like Huh?
A doctor said yes Mr. Miller, you are having a Heart Attack.
They starting peeling me like a grape and all I could say was “Well I guess we really doing this”.
The doctor said to me that he did not know how I was still conscious and was it true I drove myself to the hospital. I said yes. He just shook his head and said if there is a next time call 911. I gave him a thumbs up.
It was chaos as they got me out of my clothes and into a gown then off to surgery. My wife had called our family. I guess that’s what the doctor was telling her because they thought I might not make it. As they wheeled me down the hall there was most of my family.
I’m asking how they are and not to worry about me I was telling my wife to call my mom and this person and that person. As they wheeled me away I remembered I forgot my friend that I talked to earlier that day and I yelled back before they put me on the elevator “CALL JOHN”!
So here I was Mr. Never having high blood pressure or any life changing health issues about to undergo a heart procedure.
Again I joked with the nurses and the cardiogist as he explained what they were about to do. (insert a stint to open my artery).
I just said okay, let’s do it. I thought about my wife, my mom, my kids and focused on getting back to them. The last thing I remembered was staring at the lights. I awoke in recovery. As I opened my eyes I saw an Angel. My wife. She is the reason that I’m here.
We have so much living to do and I was not ready to leave her or my family.
Well here we are 4yrs, Life Vests ,two pacemakers two surgeries (the first pacemaker became infected but that’s another story for another time).
And Here I am with the woman I love and adore telling my story.
So yeah, this day has a huge significance in my life. It’s the day I got a second chance. One that I am determined not to waste.
I don’t want to be like an old comfortable sweater you put on when you want to feel nostalgic reminiscing about happier times.
I want to live in the here and now with you because you want me to.
Not because I’m a safety net. I’d rather walk away with the hurt and pain it would cause than to stay and watch what we have die a slow and painful death.
I wish that somehow I could get you to see how much I love you and what we have to offer one another. Your actions confirm your blindness to this fact.
Left to our current situation we are destined to a life of being unfulfilled.
Navigating Relationships 